Ever since my daughter started reception in September 2023, I have noticed that some parents if given the opportunity, would want to stay in the classroom all through the period of their child’s stay in school. You need to see some of these parents at drop off in the morning, these parents will take their child all the way through to the class, take their child’s coat off, hang it for them, take their school bag and water bottle off them, drop it at the designated place. Some of them will seat with their child to do coloring, puzzles or building blocks for few minutes before finally deciding to leave the room, the funniest part is even as they’re leaving the class room, they’re literally looking back to see or wave at their child until they can’t see their children anymore.
I’m sharing this because even before the Christmas break, a letter was sent out for parents instructing and appealing that parents should leave the children at the entrance of the classroom during drop off in the morning, this would enhance independence for the children, despite this notification, it’s three days now since resumption and some parents are still doing same, they just can’t help it.
Dear intentional parents, do you know that doing for your child what they can do for themselves means taking independence away from your child(ren)? Also, you’re taking their need for competence away from them. Are you aware that a competent child is a confident child. The truth is, these children can actually take their coats off, can put their bag in the right place by themselves. Give them the opportunity to learn on their own and even if they struggle or encounter difficulties, they have at least minimum of two adults/staffs who can support them with these. I’m not here to say parents should not care for their children, but encouraging your children to do these things on their own would do your child more good than the help you think you’re giving to your child and again remember that the teachers have already taught and practiced with them how to and where to keep these things.
Do you have trust issues thinking no one can look after your child like you would do? or are you overparenting thinking that your child is too young and that it’s her first time of leaving the home? I understand your feelings and I felt same when my daughter started, in fact, I was among those parents that shared tears the first day.
Spending extra time with your child may make other children uncomfortable, they have time table for the day and lesson starts around 8:50, so, giving them this space would help them settle and be ready for the day’s lesson. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you shouldn’t help or assist your child when there’s need to do so. Let’s say for example, your child has a broken arm, in this case, she obviously needs your assistance and this is understandable when your give your assistance.
Another situation where you can go in with your child is, when your child does not want to go to school or that they’re just crying perhaps, they’ve woken up on the wrong side of bed, this does not happen all the time so, you can actually go in with your child and get him to settle before leaving the classroom. I do this sometimes with my son. It’s important to drop your child on a positive note daily.
I encourage you to be calm, the truth is, these children you worry about all the time are fine and are coping well, you can tell from their end of the year nativity performance to parents. Trust me, your children are in a safe hand the teachers and management are doing everything possible to give your child the best of all so trust them on this and think of ways you can partner with them to give your child the best stay in school.
