As January is coming to an end, there are a few things I would like you intentional parents to stop doing. I believe that by now it is no longer news when I say you’re a role model to your child either positively or negatively. You are a role model every time you say something to your child, every time you respond or react to your child. Your child is basically watching your behaviors irrespective of their age. To be a model to your child positively means you’re an intentional parent and to be an intentional parent means doing everything that will make you a better parent for your child and to achieve this, here are few things I would suggest you get rid of.
First is overhyping your child, by this I mean parents who hype their child before co-parents just to prove a point that their child is meeting their developmental milestones or having great success in whatever it is they’re doing. You know yourselves because I see this a lot. Dear parents, you do not need to exaggerate about your child’s achievement, just say it the way it is your co-parents will understand and appreciate you more. This does not mean that you’ll not share or hide your child’s achievements not at all, all I’m saying is try not to exaggerate so you don’t lose your authenticity before your friends or co-parents or the adults around you. Also remember your child is watching and learning from you and they know when you’re telling the truth.
Secondly, avoid cutting people short when telling you things about your child. this happens most often, for example, a teacher, caregiver or anyone is saying what you really don’t want to hear about your child, Hey! Ma’am, I observed your child was constantly heating another child all through his stay and before he could conclude his statement you’ve interrupt him by trying to give an excuse for your child. Then, you say things like “he’s tired, he didn’t sleep all night”. Don’t get me wrong, I understand that there’s always a root cause for a child’s behavior but my point is LISTEN to whoever that is talking to you FIRST afterwards you can go ahead to say or give whatever excuse you have to give for your child.
Thirdly, when you’re asked about your child’s age, please tell the truth. Say for example my son is nearly 3-years-old, I will not be saying he’s 2-year -old. I’ll say he’s nearly 3 or I’ll tell you when he will clock 3. I see parents do this when their child is performing well whether in speech, academics or activities and when asked the age of their child, they reduce it to hype the child and probably make other parents feel bad that their own child isn’t performing same as your child without them realizing that the child you’re comparing with your 2-year-old is nearly 3-years. Remember a month is more than enough to make a difference in a child’s development. This is why I always kick against comparison. Leave your child to thrive at their own pace.
Lastly: parents often think that their child intentionally disobeys them. Genuinely, no child will intentionally disobey you. The truth is there are reasons why your child behaved the way they do, it could be that the communication was not clear to him, it could be that your child was distracted before carrying out the task. This is one of the characteristics of children, they live in the moment. It could also be that they do not know, they do not have the ability and have no desire to do what they’re been ask to do. So, don’t take it personal because a lot of other factors could be responsible.
Dearest intentional parents, does that mean you’re now a perfect parent? No! you’re not, there is no perfect parent on the planet earth. In your journey to becoming a better parent, there will be mistakes that will give you an opportunity to become better and better by the day. This is what this post is about, being intentional about those little things that could prevent you from being the best parent for your child and yourself.
