Mummy it’s sunny, can we go to the park please? He said to me, yes, sure after you take your church clothes off, you have your lunch then we can go to the park even though it’s not part of my plan. Every effort made to help him get his clothes off was to no avail. So, I left him and I assisted his sister while he was busy bringing the building blocks out. I asked him, Golden, is it your play time? He said no! So why are you bringing the building blocks out? He responded: because I want to play. Again, I said, I’m going to give you five more minutes to come so I can assist you get your clothes off, otherwise, you would take them off yourself.
Truly after five minutes he was not ready so I left. After a few minutes, he came downstairs with his clothes off and was holding his house-wear trouser. The next thing he said was, “mummy, I’m hungry” I replied yes, I know after you get your trousers on, then you can have your lunch. Would you like me to help you or you want to wear it yourself? He said, “I want you to help me” which I gladly did afterwards, he had his lunch.
Mummy, can we go now it’s sunny he said, I replied, sure, after you put your building blocks away, but I don’t want to he said. Why? “Because I don’t want to, he insisted, But you brought them out so it is your responsibility to put them back I said. At this point, he was just looking at me with his angry face.
I said, Oma, get your coat, let’s go to the park immediately, he said, mummy I want to go, I replied, sure, after you put your building blocks away.
While we were on it, the sister came, she said: mummy I’m ready now. I looked at him and said Golden myself and Oma are going to the park now since you refused to put your toys away, you can go upstairs and stay with your daddy. I opened the door, instantly, he started crying, while I was trying to lock the door from behind, EMPATHY just came to my mind. I took a deep breath, opened the door and said to him, would you want me to join you put your building blocks away then we can go to the park? Yes mummy, he said. I held the bag for him then he put all the blocks inside.
Empathy is one of the techniques we can use as parents or caregivers to get our children to cooperate. it also helps our boundaries, rules, principles, values to be respected.
Another technique parents can use to get their children to cooperate is helping your child to organize their toys in categories. For example, helping your child to put all their cars, building blocks, all puzzles, all the books, all the dolls in different boxes or draws or shelfs, same with their clothes, underwear’s, tops and trousers instead of say for example, your child want his car toy and in the process of looking for it, he gets the rest of the toys out and telling him to put them back might be too much for him so, creating an organization system will help your child learn how to be organize and it becomes easy for them to put their toys away after play.
Also, you can teach your child one toy in and another toy out approach. For example, your child is playing with his building blocks and all of a sudden, he changes his mind to puzzles which is absolutely fine because children are impulsive in nature, teach your child that it is okay to have puzzles after he’s put the building blocks out.
Dear parents, it is one thing to want your child to do what you want from them and it is another thing to actually get them to do what you want. I’ll encourage you to always think of a technique to use in every situation. Remember that using the right techniques at the right time will help you get your child’s cooperation.
