Since the start of this holiday, I have not been as productive as I would and the reason is because of my two toddlers. I need to spend time with them, I know that holidays are opportunities to connect more with them, having this understanding means for me that for this period, I would put some of the things I’m meant to do on hold, I’d only write my blog post and produce videos when they’re asleep, It is much easier when you have older children, but in my case, I know they need more attention and I don’t want to be pressured with workload.
Funny enough, the holiday has been going on well and for me, anytime I spend with my children is never a waste. I was meant to produce videos last night, usually my children by 8: 00pm they’re asleep, but for my daughter, last night happened to be one of those nights, every effort made to get her to sleep was abortive, I tried as much as possible to put my emotions in check even though I had every reason to be irritated or angry at her, but I choose calm so I asked her if she would want to join me downstairs to produce video so she’ll learn, she gladly said yes. I realized we had loads of tidying to do before setting up and she happily joined in.
After a while, she started playing at the same time was distracting me, this was already passed 9;00pm. I said to her, would you want to go upstairs since you’re no longer helping me? remember you’re supposed to be in bed, quickly she said “I’m going to behave now, I was about to start nagging about everything I needed to do before and after producing the video and how stressful I am when I remember doing my job with smile.
I know that I am my child’s greatest role model and I also know that she’s definitely going to do the things she sees me do more than the things I’d ask her to do, being a role model for her at this point of me feeling pressured was a difficult thing to do, does that mean I should not express how I was feeling? no! does that mean my feelings were not valid? Of course they were, there’re healthy ways for me to do so instead of groaning and moaning.
How do I think my child will see chores, her homework if all she sees me do is complain about mine. The whole essence is for her to see me happy doing my job, for her to see that my job challenges me to bring out the best in me, to see that my job is helping me grow intellectually, to see that I get rewarded for doing my job. She should see it that is something I truly look forward to instead of doing it for doing sake.
Again, I asked myself what kind of a role model am I for my child? I could have turned the tidying into fun, turn the set-up for the video into dancing and see fun in everything I was doing and needed to do. The whole essence is for me to communicate fun, joy, happiness in the things I do so my child can do same with her chores, school work and doing this will help her grow into an adult who will do her job not because it pays her bills but because she sees it fulfilling and rewarding.
Remember, parenting is not only about now but also for the future and “the best way to make children good is to make them happy” says Oscar Wilde.
