Beans happen to be one of my children’s favorite foods. When it comes to eating beans, they can eat it all day with so much pleasure. The question now is do they eat any kind of beans? No! They don’t. Nigeria beans, never, every time I prepare the Nigerian beans for them, they say to me, “Mummy, I don’t want Nigeria beans”. No matter how I try to encourage them to eat it, they always refuse, in Fact the sight of it, they’re saying “no mummy, I don’t want to eat Nigerian beans.
Also, I noticed anytime I give them baked beans, it is as if you made their day. The way they eat and enjoy it, makes me wonder why Baked beans. Many times, I’ve tried to ask them why they like the baked beans and here is usually the response I get “mummy, because is yummy” then I’ll say “but Nigeria beans are yummy too and they’ll reply but I don’t like it”.
The truth is, I personally love beans so I cook it all the time and coupled with its nutritional values, beans are full of fiber, is one of the highest sources of protein, is a good source of antioxidants, it contains minerals, is a source of choline etc. I really do not have any issues with the baked beans other than it has been processed.
As an intentional parent, I don’t believe in FORCING children to eat especially when I know the long-term damage to a child. Every now and then, I ask myself how do I get my children to eat my Nigerian beans, an intentional parent is a thinker so I started thinking, I gave them time perhaps they may change their mind so anytime I prepare the beans, I offer it to them even though I know perfectly well that they aren’t going to eat it.
This kept on until one day, as I was thinking about the beans and how to get them to eat it, I just heard a tiny voice from within that says: “prepare the beans like the baked beans’ ‘. I was a bit confused as to what does that mean? How do I prepare Nigerian beans like the baked beans? I started thinking again. This time around I heard: use stew to make it look like baked beans.
Immediately, I became very happy and gave it a try. First, I prepared the beans; usually the brown one, made it a little bit watery like the baked beans, and then got my yummy stew, mixed it up with plenty of it. This time around I know they love meat, so I added meat to it and presented it to them.
The first question Oma asked was: “mummy, is this Nigerian beans?” I replied, “What does it look like? She said I don’t know; it was obvious she wasn’t sure because she was staring at it. So, I said do you want to try it? She said okay. While Golden said, “Oma, let’s try it”, for him, the meat is the attraction. That was how these children ate, finished the one I served them and asked for more. While they were eating, Oma said, mummy this bean taste nice, I replied, thank you! do you like it? Yes, mummy! While Golden was like, “mummy, you’re the best COOKER” I said thank you and corrected him to say COOK.
Dear readers, as of today, my children intentionally ask for Nigerian beans and they would gladly eat it for any meal. The last baked beans I bought was trashed because they didn’t want it anymore. In fact, beans was our dinner last night and it was so much fun eating it together as a family.
Dear intentional parent, your case might not be beans nor food. It might be a behavioral change you expect from your child. Remember, your parenting journey is completely different from mine so what works for me might not work for you because our factors are not the same. Parenting is the same principle all over the world but different methodology. Whatever it is that you want from your child, remember the use of FORCE is never a solution. Sometimes all you need to do is to sit back and think. It is in your thinking (why my approach is not working) that you can find a solution. Again there’s no excuse for you not to give your parenting your best because there’s always a way out to any difficult situation.
