The words parent and parenting are frequently used words. If you follow me on social media, you would agree I use the word parenting a lot. Recently, I was having a conversation with a group of parents and we ended up spending over 40 minutes talking about parenting. It just reminded me again how important and interesting the subject matter is.
Quick question.
When you hear the word PARENTING, what comes to mind? A biological parent, a guardian, caregiver, adoptive parents, grandparents, family members or step-parents? Well, it is not wrong to associate all of these words with parenting.
But again, what does it entail in the real world?
Here are key points about parenting that will help you understand the subject matter better than just a dictionary definition.
_Firstly, the word parenting simply means the process of raising a child from birth and ensuring their healthy development into adulthood.
In other words, it is the process of supporting and helping a child to develop holistically i.e (emotionally, socially, financially, physically and intellectually and spiritually).
_Secondly, Parenting is beyond caring for a child: While parenting could also be a process of caring and nurturing for a child, I’d like you to understand that it is not all there is to parenting. It is important to provide food and the daily needs of your child as a parent but most importantly, parenting is about providing spiritual, and moral guardians, setting boundaries, principles, rules, structures and systems in place.
-Parenting is that important yet no prior training, hardest of all jobs. The truth is, being a parent is the most important job we do in the world with no payment (At least not in cash). It is a job we don’t get prepared for, although very rewarding in the end.
It is a paid price of YOU recognizing who you truly are. Will this stop you from having a child?
_Parenting is hard work: This is another truth I must tell you. Parenting is real work but when done with intentionality can become easy.
I find it funny when I hear people say things like, “Well, I am good with my nieces and nephews, when I have my child, it will be easy-peasy”.
My response is, it is not always the case. It’s the most difficult job to do if it’s not done intentionally.
Parenting is beyond what meets the eye. It is about teaching, and training the brains of your child for success in life. It is about showing your child how to do things and modeling the behavior you expect from your child. It is about being calm in the midst of chaos, knowing what to do per-time, understanding your child’s developmental stage and behaviours to expect.
_Parenting is a way of life: Parenting is not just about techniques but your way of life. That is your character, values, actions and inactions. It is shaping the future of your child and the entire society.
Sometimes, individuals assume parenting is natural. They feel as soon as you have your child, you automatically know what to do and how to raise a child but sadly, it is not always the case.
This is the reason many parents struggle as soon they start their parenting journey. No one was born skilled in parenting it is a learned skill we all need to embrace.
Finally, Parenting is about being warmth at the same time being firm with your child.
In the words of M. Scott Peck “love is the will to extend one’s self to nurture one’s own or another’s spiritual growth. Love is an act of will. We do not have to love. We choose to love.”
For me, this is exactly what parenting is all about.
So, Dear intentional parents
Parenting is hard work but with knowledge, you’ll be able to navigate the challenges of parenting that will help you to become the best possible parent for not just your child but also for yourself.
Cheers to intentional parenting!
